Sympathy For The Devil by Ozzy Osbourne

Nathaniel: No this is not over! I am the most powerful being in the universe! Brodie! Kill him!

Brodie Lee: What do you think I’m trying to do Exalted One? He’s overwhelming us with those blasted drones of his!

Nathaniel: You know I can’t effect him! I gave you all the tools! Now, eliminate “Broken” Matt Hardy!

Brodie Lee: Yes, Exalted One. I’m afraid I have no choice! *Pulls out The Cursed Dusty Rhodes Book*. Come here! *grabs Alex Reynolds by the hair and forces him to read The Book* Read the book and gives up a way to beat him!

*Alex Reynolds read The Cursed Dusty Rhodes book then dies. A mystic portal opens and coming out of the portal is Sammy Guevara, armed with a steel chair. Guevara lands a steel chair shot on the back of “Broken” Matt Hardy. Hardy falls unconscious. Guevara lands repeated chair shots on Hardy, mostly on the back with a few on the head. When the job is done, Guevara steps back into the portal and disappears*

Mike Check’s Daughter: Well. That was. Rather specific?

Mike Check: It looks like the odds changed there, feller.

Brodie Lee (panics): No! Its not possible! I did everything right!

Anna Jay (defends Brodie Lee): You still got me Mr. Brodie! I’ll kill them all

*Kylie Rae rushes in*

Kylie Rae: Oh I’ve been waiting for this! I’m supposed to have my Knockouts Title Match *looks at her watch* Right now! You kidnapper me because it was a MISTAKE AND YOU RUINED THE BIGGEST OPPORTUNITY I EVER HAD!

*Mike Check’s Daughter rushes to Kylie’s aid, armed with a stiletto heel*

Mike Check’s Daughter: I’m kind of getting sick and tired of becoming a victim! From that man *points to STAN* to right now! I’ve been in my fights before! Come on!

*While the ladies fight…*

STAN: Oh! I’ve been waiting for this!

*Mike Check & John E. Bravo rush to his side*

Mike Check: Feller! You crossed with the wrong person! I don’t take kindly to those that want to take my station. I’ll have to follow Mongrovian policy on when a greenhorn like you tries to take over any public media outlets! Death by Combat!

Bravo: You kidnapped my wife! Our wedding is going to happen soon! Don’t you know how stressful this wedding I’m going to have?!?

STAN (to John E Bravo): Aw stop your whining, groomzilla!

Bravo (to STAN): She chose me! I’m proud to be her wife! I got all these simps telling me that I’m not good for her! Your telling me I’m no good for her! Enough of this STAN, Satan, or whatever your name is!

STAN: Look! You overgrown hillbilly! You took my powers, you made me mortal so I have to be like these, ugh! I’m going to need a shower afterwards! The worse part. Is that you (yelling at Brodie Lee and Nathaniel) made people have sympathy for me! The Devil! When I’m done with the both of you! I’m going to make both of you into a cute version of The Human Centipede!