Monthly Archives: December 2014
Mike Check: Well, The Mike Check Show is back broadcasting exclusively at KMCR studios again due to that mishap in Orlando the other day. But there’s finally good news fellers, my daughter got her job back at “dance studio”. So it’s back to normal & it’s going to be a Happy New Year here on The Mike Check Show because the only thing that’s closing is the year 2014, so here’s…
Mike’s Daughter: But it’s not back to normal dad! I mean, we’re deeper in debt now, do you know how much that stuff that was destroyed cost? And do you know how many…I mean, much work I’ll have to do to pay for…
Mike Check: Hush darlin’. Here’s “The Closing Of The Year” by Wendy & Lisa with Seal here on THE MACKER!
Mike Check: Hello Fellers. I’m about the head back to…
Mike’s daughter: Dad! The security system that I set up in your trailer in Orlando is going haywire!
Mike Check What do you mean my whiz-kid dear?
Mike’s Daughter: Wait, let me log on to the cameras….a man with a floral Mask has just broken into your trailer dad!? It looks like he wants to say something, I’ll turn the volume up…
Midnight Rose: Say hello to the Midnight Rose mang! Are you trying to bust my fucking balls by playing these songs about balls old Cowboy! First you have this Adam Rose taking my Rosebud catchphrase! Then you have this Romantic Touch taking my style mang! All I have left in this world are my balls and my word! Speaking of “Balls And My Word”, that song by The Geto Boys is like a chicken waiting to get plucked, so play it mang or you can stick your head up your toilet!
Mike Check: Is that masked Cuban feller gone? Thank…
Mike’s Daughter: No he’s still…OH NO!
Midnight Rose: Say hello to my little friend! [*Destroys Mike’s equipment with a Colt AR-15 and then leaves*]
Mike Check: Oh no, those thingamabobs cost a lot of money! But why? What else can go wrong?!
[*phone rings*] KMCR Radio, Ole Mike Check here.
Bob Iger: Hello Mark Check? This is Bob Iger from Disney and I have been informed that you have been using some bad language…
Mike Check: No! Ah, it was that masked Cuban feller…!
Bob Iger: Yes he’s been arrested, but I’m also appalled about the offensive tunes about “male genitals” that you have been broadcasting on this unauthorized Internet radio show in the vicinity of Disney World’s parking lot. That’s not wholesome entertainment, unlike Lindsay Lohan and Miley Cyrus, that we at Disney approve of and not the family image that we encourage from our employees. So I’m sorry to also inform you that I’m wishing you well on your future endeavors. Good day sir. [*hangs up phone*]
Mike Check: Well looks like poor ole Mike is broke again. I just hope no “Angry” fellers show up to request songs next year.
Well fellers, ole Mike’s Christmas break is almost over and I’ll soon be heading back to my job driving the choo-choo train at Disney World. My daughter has still not found another job and we really need the money, so you could say that we’ve got our “Balls To The Wall” here on THE MACKER!
P.S. I hope I don’t get in trouble for saying “Balls”, they’re very strict on bad language over at Disney.
Speaking of “balls”, remember when I told you fellers about the first time I went to jail thanks to Jerry Lee Lewis’ bad advice. Well the next time I saw Jerry after my release, let’s just say, ole Mike gave his “Great Balls of Fire” a literal meaning, let me tell you! But it’s still a great song though:
Mike Check: I hope you fellers enjoyed 2014’s edition of Mike Check’s Christmas Carousal. Are you fellers already starting to take down your Christmas ornaments. I’m currently back at home on my break, from my job ay Disney World, removing my balls from my Christmas tree as we speak. You know, I usually enjoy hanging my balls on a big bush that I pick up around the street-corner that I then discard every year after Christmas. Speaking of balls, we’re still going to have a ball here on KMCR because ole Mike is gonna play “Big Balls” by AC/DC here on…THE MACKER!
Mike’s Daughter: Really Dad? You’re full of really bad innuendos today.
Mike Check: What innuendos???