Lust For A Vampyr by I Monster
Mike Check: Well there fellers! It seems that ole Mike is safe once again thanks to some unlikely friends; Broken Matt, The Boogeyman and…
Mike’s Daughter: But there was never a Boogeyman here. I told you, it’s just your imagination!
Rosemary: No! WE are certain that the Boogieman is real.
Mike’s Daughter: But he’s not…Rosemary, What are you still doing here?
Rosemary: WE must free the Voodoo Kin Mafia from the stomach of Su Yung’s Undead Maid Of Honor.
Mike’s Daughter: Uh??? I would think that they would have been well digested by now???
Rosemary: WE will see about that?! (*Rosemary looks towards the from door*) Bunny!
Allie (*bursts through Mike’s front door with an Axe*): I’M ALLIE!
*Allie cuts open the Undead Maid of honor’s corpse, freeing Road Dogg and Billy gun…who are both still alive.*
Road Dogg: What in the shizzle just happened here?!
Rosemary: WE and Bunny have freed you. NOW GO!
Billy Gunn: But could you at least explain how we are still alive and…(*looks to check if his posterior is still there*) fully intact…???
*Rosemary hisses and scares The NAO/VKM away*
Mike’s Daughter: I guess we won’t be getting an explanation for what the hell just happened here either?
Rosemary (*scary facial expression turns into a smile and taps Mike’s Daughter on her nose with her index finger*): Do not fear, WE on the Earth Relm are now safe from Su Yung.
Mike Check: Oh, Rosemary. You scare the heck out of me but your smile is making ole Mike feel a little “Lust For A Vampyr” right now. How about you and your pretty filly friend for yours join ole Mike upstairs?
Mike’s Daughter: Shut up dad! (*to Rosemary*) Don’t hurt my idiot dad, he’s old and can make some inappropriate comments sometimes.
Rosemary: Never fear. WE will not harm Mike Check (*goes to Mike and seductively slides her finger down Mike’s face*) But Bunny is a different story—
Allie: I’M ALLIE! (*Kicks Mike in the balls*)
Mike Check: Ouch!!!
*Allie and Rosemary leave while Mike’s Daughter facepalms*