Green Eggs And Ham by Seussical Original Broadway Cast / Space Invaders by Player One

STAN: Bwhahahaha! Now my Mazis. Now that I STAN have taken over Mars, I can do whatever I want before using these Martian slaves to take over Mike Check’s beloved Earth. But first, I want to feast on Silicone.

Mazi #1: But King STAN? Why do you want that?

STAN: Because I’m hungry? Duh? I’ve been about six months away from Earth Hell and I’m freakin’ starving. The food pills on this planet are terrible!

Mazi #2: King STAN. If you are hungry, we have procured an edible substance for you to consume similar to what the Earthlings call “Ham”. (*opens box containing the ham and shows it to STAN*)

STAN: (*covers his nose in disgust*): Eeeewwww! I can’t eat that?!

Mazi #3: But? What’s wrong with it King STAN?

STAN: What’s wrong with it?! For one, ham is not supposed to be green, smell really bad and look like a freakin’ Chestburster?!

Mazi #1: That’s because it’s Alien Ham, King STAN. It’s a Mazi delicacy.

STAN: Delicacy?! Throw that crap away and get me Silicone! Now!

Mazi #2: But King STAN, we cannot slaughter the Martians for silicon, because like the Earthlings, they are all carbon based?

STAN (*sigh*): No! I said Silicone, not Silicon!

Mazi #3: I am sorry King STAN but we are not sure what Silicone is? Are you sure you don’t want to drink Martian blood instead?

STAN: …What?! No! Green blood? Are you freakin’ kidding me?

Mazi #1: But I hear that green blood is quite tasty?

Jimdar: If you want green blood, take my wife…please take her! She’s a two timing whore!


Jimdar: Ahh, go—-!

STAN: Shut up you two and keep bowing to me! (*to Mazis*) The answer is NO!

Mazi #2: But, King STAN, it will make you awesome!

STAN: What the freakin’ heavens are you talking about!? I said that I don’t want green blood or green ham…or even green eggs in a house with a mouse for that matter! (*sigh*) Why do I feel like that I’m in a Dr Seuss book surrounded by a bunch of freakin’ idiots from or some bad Thai movie from the 1970’s!?…

STAN: And whoever is playing that freakin’ song?! Stop it!… (*to Mazis*) Look, I have an idea? What I want is an Earth woman delivered to me, but I don’t want any random human, bring me….Mike Check’s daughter!

Mike Check: What?! Feller, No?! I’ll do anything?!

STAN: Oh shut up Mike! (*to Damien*) Damien, take these Mazi imbeciles with you to “Invade” Earth and bring me Mike’s daughter! Bwhahahhaha!

Posted on April 22, 2018, in music and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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