Planet Claire by B-52’s
Mike Check: Weellll for our next song—
(*Interrupted by a female voice*): Jimdar! Why have you not introduced me to the Earthling like you had promised?
Jimdar: Hush, woman! I am busy having to endure this inferior “music” from Earth! Now take your ugly antennae back home!
Mike Check: Feller, that’s no way to talk to a lady, even though she might be a green ug…(*notices that Jimdar’s wife is actually attractive*)…why hello there! What’s your name there you pretty filly?
Jimdar (*interrupts*): Her name is Clairedar! And stop talking to my wife, Mike Check! Ever since Mars has discovered your vile Earth music and culture, now all the females on Mars want to glam themselves up and, get this, they want to have equal rights to males! What is the world coming to?!
Clairedar: Jimdar! I can talk for myself! Kimar has invited me to listen to Mike Check’s music, so that’s why I’m here.
Jimdar: No! I forbid it! Go Kc—
Jimdar: That is it! I cannot take much more of this! I’m leaving now! Now come with me woman!
Clairedar: No, Jimdar. I will stay for a while.
Jimdar: Gggrrrrr! Very well! But be sure to be back by the third moonlight! And Mike Check, you better not Kcuf my wife or you will cease to live! (*storms off*)
Checkdar: So, shall we re-commence our musical commentary Mike Check?
Mike Check: Weellll, since Clairedar is here, why don’t I dedicate a song to her, I know one particular song titled “Planet Clairedar”…I mean—
Gaiedar: A song for Clairedar? But why didn’t you dedicate a song to me Mike Check?
Mike Check: I did. Didn’t I play Lou Reed or something a while ago?
Gaiedar: Oh yes. Why don’t you play it again…play it quickly! Hga Hga Hga!
Mike Check: No, let’s stick to “Planet Claire”, for this pretty filly Clairedar, by The B52’s here on…THE MACKER!