If You’ve Got Trouble by The Beatles
Foley: We’re back on “Mike Check: This Is Your Life” and we’re joined once again by special guest from The Beatles: Ringo Starr.
Ringo: It’s a pleasure Mick. But not so much for that vile old geezer.
Mike Check: Why you no good…if I was 60 years younger I’d…
Foley: Mike, you promised before we were on the air that you would give “Peace A Chance” (*crickets*). But think of this as a therapy session. So do you have any stories about Ringo you’d like to get off your chest Mike?
Mike Check: Oh I can tell you about the times that Englishman was my room-mate from hell who wrecked my home and drank all my beer, back at the time when I worked a short stint for BBC Radio in the 50s. Every-time ole Mike would confront him about anything all he’d say things like “You better leave me alone” and “Don’t bring your troubles to me” and then he’d go and write a song about it. I am not a happy man because that, let me tell you.
Ringo: Oh C’mon Mike. You’re trying to take credit for my success?
Mike Check: Credit?! You could say that I named his stupid band! Did I ever tell you about the time Ringo introduced me to his friends John, Larry, and was it George? I don’t know. Anyway, they were a band known as “The Blackjacks” at the time and Ringo chose the day of days that ole Mike was fired from the BBC (but that’s a story for another day) to have band practice. I was in a bad mood enough as is was and their music, which was so much noise, kept me awake all night. I yelled at them calling their music a bunch of “chirping Beatles”!
Ringo: That’s bollocks Mike. Ask Paul McCartney, The Beatles name came from a dream that I had. Let’s face it, the Beatles became a success right after I joined them because of MY talent and original ideas. I mean, Pete Best as a drummer? Don’t make me laugh.
Mike Check: He was better than a big-nosed, soft-headed hack like you feller! Speaking of that, can you smell the coffee all the way in Brazil with that darn thing!?
Ringo: Oh how original Mike. You think I’m soft in the head? Well try someone softer instead pretty thing.
Mike Check: I don’t even understand that particular reference!?
Foley: Neither do I?…but on that note, let’s leave those “troubles” alone and go to a song: